Journal Entry #4 (10/12/2125)
Wow! Today we went to visit the World’s Largest Teapot. I read about it in a magazine once, it was an old one, from well before the Vault was in operation. A tourist-y one, you know the sort. About giant balls of yarn, the world’s biggest Swiss cheese and the world’s tallest stripper pole. That sort of thing. Well, maybe not the last one. If there was one, I’d have found it 😉
Anyway. We saw the picture on our map and just had to go. I was a bit disappointed because I kind of was hoping to get a nice hot cuppa. I did come out with a novelty teapot though. That actually didn’t even remotely resemble the giant one. Again, another disappointment. We were set upon by dogs and radroaches too. “Protecting the giant teapot”. As if it was much use anymore. We did get it working actually and we got a few cups to take away. Mine went cold though. And Nova spilled one of his.
Venturing westward, a bar caught my eye (of course). It was called ‘The Rusty Pick’ and apparently used to be a cool place for miners to go hang out. Sadly, the only miners that were hanging out there anymore were Nova (get it, “minor”, cos he’s a youngun, ha ha, I kill me) and these weird oversized mole things with tentacles coming out of their faces. Creepy as fuck. Seriously. I felt like we were being chased by a fat, old, hairy, Predator (you know, from those ollllllld movies with Arnold Schwarzenegger in). It even had a gauntlet, just like Predator. But it wasn’t as quick. And I fired a load into its fucking creepy-ass head.
Actually, we found a secret entrance in the bar that led down to what I can only describe as the would-be Gates of Hell. We played ‘The Floor is Lava’. Because it really was. We didn’t find much except a bunch of dead firefighters and a butt-load of Scorched (also creepy-ass mofos). I thought Novadoam would have really enjoyed being down there because if there’s one thing I’ve learned about him, it’s that he’s an utter pyromaniac. He refuses to leave a single car standing and insists on blowing every single one to smithereens. Whether or not I am standing close by. The amount of Stimpaks I’ve gone through is unreal. But it keeps him happy. And I’ve a responsibility to the guy, ever since his parents dumped him on my doorstep. Or rather the Vault’s doorstep. God only knows where he’s from or what his backstory is. I don’t ask. I just know that blowing things up makes him happy and that’s enough for me.